Left standing

Last week I got stood up.

Not in the old school way.  I wasn’t left standing awkwardly in a pub on my own. But I was stood up in the ‘millennial’ way. I was blocked on WhatsApp. I hate myself for even uttering those words but, 15 minutes before I was meant to meet up with this guy, I was blocked. The only reason I knew this before getting out of the house and being stood up for real was because I was running late – as always. I normally hate that I am always late for things but, in this particular instance, it saved me a lot of public embarrassment.

I was still embarrassed by it though. I had chatted to this guy for over a week. We had had daily conversations about life, the universe and everything. He seemed like a genuinely decent guy and I will admit it, I had a bit of a flutter. He was good looking, he was a full participant in a range of topics of conversation, he usually messaged first which I took to be a good sign. We seemed to have stuff in common and we made each other laugh, or so I thought.

I had told my friends I was going on this date, my mum had been booked to babysit, i’d done my hair and make up (and looked pretty good if I do say so myself) and then it didn’t happen. I was upset, angry, confused but also completely mortified.

I have no idea why, in the last few moments he decided he didn’t want to meet me.  I’m not going to make excuses for him as I have done for other men. He is a coward and a dick but it didn’t hurt any less even though I knew this.

I hadn’t been on a date for a while because I was fed up of knobs (literally and figuratively), I was fed up of being let down and I was fed up of wasting my time and I managed to have it happen all over again.  Unfortunately it doesn’t hurt any less the more it happens.

After yet another bad experience I did wonder if I should just give up on the prospect of a healthy, happy relationship with a bloke all together but, after attending a well-timed mindfulness workshop in London I realised that there is no point in dwelling on the ‘whys’ and the ‘what ifs’ of the date, of my love life or my life in general, it will only hurt me further  stop me focusing in the important things.  I should only be concentrating on what is happening now, as this is the only time I have any control over. So I think I shall make the most of the here and now and see what comes along whilst I’m getting on with it.

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6 Comments

  1. gymbunnymummy

    March 21, 2016 at 10:29 pm

    What a knob! Him, not you. At least you found out about his utter knobbishness before you wasted a night out with him X

    1. theperfectjuggler

      March 21, 2016 at 10:34 pm

      Knobbishness is officially the best word ever!! And thanks, yep lucky getaway I guess. Thanks for commenting x

  2. niapattenlooks

    March 22, 2016 at 8:35 am

    What a cowardly knobhead! He should be ashamed of himself! X

    1. theperfectjuggler

      March 22, 2016 at 10:10 am

      Indeed he is. Not the first to act like that unfortunately though so seems there’s a few of them out there. Thanks for reading and commenting 🙂 x

  3. Lauren

    November 6, 2016 at 11:54 am

    Hi,

    Just read your post I had exactly the same thing happen to me last night it’s humiliating and I still can’t get my head around it.
    I actually managed to speak with the guy’s sister in law over fb and she told me he does this all the time to girls!
    Why would a man be so manipulative?!

    1. theperfectjuggler

      November 6, 2016 at 6:43 pm

      I’m so sorry to hear you had to go through this too. It’s such a horrible feeling ? I think the only reason a man (boy) would act like that is if they don’t know what they want and haven’t sorted out their own issues. Best to stay far far away despite wanting to ask all the questions. There are some good ones out there promise! X

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